Broken, but Beautiful
by Destiel-in-a-nutshell
Summary: Cas has just come back from Purgatory with no memory of how; all Cas knows is that he has a second chance to tell Dean how he feels and decides to do just that. Will their love blossom, and Dean help a newly human Cas? Or, will he abandon the thought of loving his guardian angel, out of fear? Destiel and eventual Sabriel . Inspired by Ep. Little Slice of Kevin. Fluff maybe smut
1. Chapter 1

Broken, but beautiful...

 **Chp 1**

"Hello Dean" Cas' voice hums through the hotel bathroom. He has been gone for almost a year trapped in Purgatory. How is he here?

"Cas?" Dean's voice, broken. It came out as nothing but a whisper.

"Is this real? Are you really here?" tears spring into Dean's eyes, but he was distraught to care.

Without an answer, Dean pulls Cas to the bathroom floor, pulling him into his lap and hiding his face in the side of his neck. Small tears drip like rain onto Castiel's skin. Oh, what a relief it was to have him in his arms.

"Dean, why are you crying?" Cas' curious voice rings in Dean's ears. He usually has that effect on him, although he would didn't want to admit it. Dean's voice becomes concerned, almost angry.

"Cas, what that fuck do you mean why am I crying? Cas, how are you even here; I tried to save you too, but you let go. I thought you were gone I thought…I though-thought you were…" His voice breaking "I thought you were de-dead. I thought I was never going to see you again." Dean is sobbing by this point something that he never does, but he's different with Cas.

"Dean I would never give up. I especially would never give up on you, you should know that. I let go, because I knew if I went into that portal, you would get hurt. I didn't care if I died, but I could never risk putting you in danger like that." Cas' words sink in and Dean starts to feel calmer his breathing finally evening out. Cas kisses Dean's forehead, slightly salty from sweat.

"Dean you have to know something and I don't know how you are going to take it." Worry flickers through Dean's eyes as he meets Cas' gaze. "Dean I love you. I love you so much, and I'm so sorry I had to let go. All of this made me realize how much you really mean to me. I'm sorry that I'm putting this on you, but you have to know that I love you."

Sam finally notices what's going on in the room next to him. He had become oblivious as he was reading a newspaper looking for a hunt. "Cas?" Noticing the entanglement of the two bodies he decides to leave, understanding that the two men are gonna need some time alone together. _It's about time too; those two lovebirds have always cared a little more than just normal friends_ should. "Oh, um hi. I'm gonna go. I'm glad your okay Cas." His cheeks heating up into a rosy pink color.

Dean stares into those ocean blue eyes and immediately is lost. _Wow. Cas actually loves me too?_ A smile stretches across Dean's face, lighting up the room.

"Oh Cas." Dean starts noticing the little things about Cas that he has always loved. The way his eyes always seem to swallow him whole. The way his lips turn up into a perfect smirk. The little things like that.

Their faces slowly lean in, lips grazing across the others. They were taking their time, not rushing the moment, enjoying every touch. Dean had always heard of people talking about how when your in love, every touch is different; it's like sparks connecting their souls with every kiss and every caress. He never believed it until now. The kisses although started becoming more hungry more needy. Cas of course, unsure of what to do since this was his first time with anyone. Although he did quickly catch on, meeting each movement of Dean's lips with his own. Dean gently bites down onto Cas' lower lip earning a low moan and granting access into the man's hungry mouth. He slips his tongue into Cas' mouth earning once again another pleasurable moan. Dean pulls away before thing get too heated, and Cas whimpers missing the feeling of Dean's mouth on his. This earns a guilty grin from Dean, of course, but it's time to talk.

"We have to talk. I need to know what happened, Cas." Cas sighs pulling back from Dean to rest his head on the side of the sink. What did happen? All he knew was that he was in Purgatory fighting off a couple Leviathan, and then he was here standing in a bathroom kissing Dean.

"I don't know. I was fighting, and then there was a white flash of light, and then I was kissing you….Dean I'm so sorry."

"Sorry for what Cas, you didn't do anything. This is my fault I shouldn't have let you go." tears fall from his eyes again from the memory of letting go of Cas' arm in the portal.

"No, Dean. I let go for your safety I knew if I didn't let go then you would get hurt. I couldn't let that happen. I told you that if I went into the portal with you then the portal would most likely reject my being. If that had happened, I believe that would be the cause you getting hurt; I could never be the reason for you to get hurt. So don't ever think this is your fault. I was the one that let go…not you." Cas kisses away Dean's tears and cradles the side of his face. Dean leans into his touch, feeling the warmth of his hand on his face; feeling the safety of Cas' presence.

"But, Cas what if you never came back? What if you never knew how I feel about you? It was killing me to know that after all the chances I had…I never admitted it. I couldn't…I can't say it yet, but I do."

"I know Dean and I didn't expect you to say it back yet. It's fine as long as you are mine." Dean gives Castiel another slow gentle kiss but ends it at that.

"I'm sorry Cas. I care about you, but this is gonna have to take me some time. This scares me so much…showing affection, showing…love… for you, but it's not because of you. Don't think that this is because of you; I just have my own issues that I need to work through."

"I know Dean, it's okay. You won't hurt me."

"But what if I do?"

"Dean Winchester I love you so much and I know that you would never do anything to hurt me." Cas pulls up out of Dean's lap still holding Dean's hand. "I'm sorry to interrupt this conversation, but I'm tired Dean, can we rest?"

"Yea Cas, anything you need I'm here. But, first let's get you cleaned up, you're a mess."

"Dean, how do I "clean up" myself?" Dean mentally face palms himself _of course, he doesn't even know how to take a shower. I could shower with him? No I want to take my time with him show him how much he means to me. I don't want him to be just another one night stand like everyone else. However, that doesn't mean I can't take a shower with him just no fooling around right?_

"Well. I can take a shower with you, so you can know what to do?" A question burns Dean's face red.

"Yes Dean, I would like that very much." Cas smiles at Deans flushed face.

"But, um Cas I don't wanna fool around yet…"

"I don't understand what you mean Dean." Of course he doesn't. Cas doesn't understand anything dirty or sexual… YET. I wonder if he even knows how sex works. To him this is simply learning to shower…with me.

"Oh um well um." for the first time ever Dean is actually flustered over the thought of sex. "Well you see usually when two grown people get into a shower together, they um, um ha-ha they um have sex in the shower."

"Oh." This had never occurred to Castiel that sex would be in other places besides just a bedroom. Fascinating, and perhaps someday he would like to try this with Dean.

"Dean that's fine how ever long you want to wait will be perfect with me." This gives Dean a lot of obvious relief as his body relaxes.

"How do we start the process of cleansing the body?" Cas and his formal wording it's odd, but it suits him that's something that makes him... Cas.

"Well Cas you should start with um uh…taking off your clothes." Dean blushes even more if that's even possible. He is still a little unsure of this, but this is about taking care of Cas, not him. Cas meets eyes with Dean and begins too peel off his shirt after untying his tie. This is definitely something that Dean could get used to… seeing Cas like this. His perfect little angel was very well built; he had many muscles and smooth skin. He was breathtaking. Of course, he was a little smaller than Dean was, but his body was absolutely breath taking, as was his soul. Dean follows in suit and begins to take off his clothing as well. Once he and Cas are in nothing but their boxer briefs, he continues to stare, appreciating Cas' body. Unable to control his urges to love Cas he allows himself finally kiss his angel. It's nothing but a gentle small kiss, but to Dean it is enough and it is everything now.

"Dean we might want to stop before you become too uncomfortable, it's okay." Dean sighs avoiding his want to take Cas right then and there. _'When it finally comes to time I want it to be special, and I don't want to hurry it either. I want to take my time with Cas; I want to treat him better than I have ever treated another lover before. Although, no other lover could ever compare to Cas, he is perfect. He is the one that I actually want a future with him, not just a good fuck._

"Well Cas you see now we turn on the water on a warmer setting, but before you get under the water check and make sure it's not too hot or too cold like this see?" Dean holds his hand under the water and lucky enough the water is the perfect temperature. "So now you need to finish getting undressed." immediately Cas follows Dean's order, slips off his grey boxer briefs, and tosses them in the corner of the room. Dean gulps seeing the large size of his angel…and he wasn't even hard. Dean then strips also out of his underwear and gently leads Cas into the relaxing hot shower.

"Do we just stand under the water Dean and that is it?" Dean chuckles at his angel's innocence to even the simplest human things such as taking a shower.

"No, Cas baby we have to actually wash ourselves, here I'll show you." Dean grabs the small hotel shampoo and puts a plenty amount into the palm of his hand. "See Cas now you take this, this is called shampoo and it is used to wash your hair. You put it in your hands like this and then rub it into your hair." Castiel closes his eyes and sighs as Dean continues to lather his head. The sight makes Dean relax even more and feel more at peace. Peace, it's so odd that something so simple as peace is something that he hasn't felt in years…. until now that he can hold Cas and make sure that he is safe and taken care of.

"Now you lean your head back under the water and rinse out all of the shampoo." When all of the suds are out of his hair Dean grabs a cloth for Castiel and pulls out the blue body wash he keeps with him. "So Cas um if this makes you feel uncomfortable just tell me. It's okay."

"No Dean if it's alright with you, I would like you to continue taking care of me."

"Well Cas this part of the shower consists more of touching your body and I don't know if I'm really ready for that." Dean glows bright red once again. Ugh, Dean never gets shy. "But if you want I can wash you until I need to stop."

"That's fine Dean, but if you don't want to I can do it myself." Cas looks disappointed.

"No, never mind I want to do this for you, Cas." Although, Dean does want to take care of Cas, he's worried that he will lose control and he isn't ready for that part of the relationship yet.

He starts at the shoulders looking at his profound muscles and occasionally looking into Cas' eyes to see that they have already been staring back. He has the most beautiful gorgeous eyes. The cloth then begins to go lower and spread the bubbles onto his chest wiping all dirt and sweat remaining on him from Purgatory. His smooth skin is now wet and soapy.

"Cas, I hope you understand how much you really mean to me." his thoughts leading to all the times he would worry about Cas' safety when he would be gone, or occasionally wouldn't answer his prayers.

"I know Dean it's okay you don't have to say it yet."

"I'm sorry Cas, I Really am. I want to prove to you that my feelings are real, but I can't….not yet." When the shower ends and they are both thoroughly clean, Dean continues by drying off Castiel with a fresh towel. He shows him how to wrap it around his waist to cover himself. , and walks out of the bathroom.

"Alright lets put on some pajamas, and then we can go to sleep, okay Cas?"

"That sounds nice, Dean. Um Dean?" worry lines show on Cas' face.

"What do you need baby?" Dean looks lovingly into Cas' eyes.

"Um when I came out of Purgatory it seems that some of my grace may have faltered and I am weaker than I was before. I don't know when it will come back, so I may have to do more humanly things for a while such as: sleep, eat, and cleanse myself."

"Cas baby, what's wrong."

"Dean, what if I never fully get my powers back. What if something really happened to my grace and I…" Dean cuts him off with a silencing kiss, which Cas returns.

"Cas it's okay, you're alright. No matter what I'm not going anywhere and I am going to take care of you. I'm just sorry I never did any of this before." Cas begins to cry, not of sadness but of relief.

"Can I sleep with you tonight Dean."

"Cas, you can sleep with me anytime you want I was kinda hoping since we are um together now, that would be every night. Is that what you want Cas? Do you want to be with me now?"

"Dean I want you to always be mine from now on and forever."

"Come on baby let's go to sleep." Dean pulls back the blankets pulling Cas into the bed with him.

"What do we do Dean?" Dean chuckles.

"Come here." Dean pulls Cas to him, nuzzling his face into his neck. Cas closes his eyes and almost immediately, his breathing slows into a nice peaceful sleep. Dean can't help but look at his angel; beautiful and broken, sleeping safely in his bed…their bed. Dean kisses Cas' hair smelling the scent of hotel shampoo that actually smells quite nice. He could get used to this. Sleeping every night next to the man, he loves.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chp 2** Dean POV

I wake up to Sam walking in through the door. He looks at Cas and me and gets a big goofy grin on his face.

"What's that grin for?"

"Oh shit Dean I'm sorry I thought you were asleep. Um so I see you guys have FINALLY gotten together."

"Sssshhhh you bitch, he's sleeping. But, yes we are now together."

"Jerk. Um Dean why is Cas sleeping he's a fucking angel they never sleep."

"Ugh, Sammy shut up before you wake him up I'll explain in the morning."

"Is he okay?"

"Yea. He will be fine." Cas starts fidgeting in his sleep becoming more and more restless by the second.

"Dean, Dean no Dean don't hurt him." His mumbles are loud enough to understand. Shit Cas is having a nightmare….

"Cas. Cas Babe wake up. Cas it's just a dream." Dean shakes him awake and Cas bolts upright in the bed searching frantically through the room for Dean. He looks over into Dean's worried eyes and sinks into his chest as Dean holds him. They are both now sitting up and Dean is gently rocking Cas back and forth whispering into Cas' ear. Completely forgetting that his brother is now in the room, but he doesn't care anyway all he cares about right now is Cas.

"Hey your okay it's okay. I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere. What happened baby?"

"It it was the Leviathans they had you and were torturing you. Dick was just about to slit your neck when you woke me up." Cas starts frantically checking Dean making sure he was okay. He didn't stop until he realized that Dean was perfectly fine no scrapes or bruises. A sigh of relief fell out of Cas as he sweetly kissed Dean's neck and pulled his arms around Dean's torso. Sam decided it was finally time to make his presence known.

"Um hey Cas are you okay? Do you need me to get you anything; do you want some tea or maybe a beer to calm your nerves?" Sam asked worriedly watching the man cradled lovingly in his brother's arms.

"Heya Sammy, yea can you get some of that tea you like that calms you I think that would be good for Cas right now. I don't really think beer would be the best thing in the world for him right now to help calm him down. We know what happened last time he had alcohol." Dean answered for Cas. The memory of Cas sitting on the sidewalk that Dean found him on in a drunken mess saying he found a liquor store and then drank it. It was true apparently, he had a much higher tolerance since he had his angel grace and he drank nearly half of the store's liquor supply.

"Yea I'll be right back." Sam went into the little kitchen area around the corner of the room.

"I'm sorry Dean."

"Cas, don't worry there's nothing to be sorry about this is a normal human thing it sucks, but it is completely normal. I used to have to calm down Sammy when he was younger he had a lot of nightmares. It is no problem for me to take care of any of your needs." Cas looks up into Dean's concerned face. Their lips meet, but not for long; Cas is still pretty tired...escaping Purgatory usually does that to a person. "It's okay baby I will always be right here whenever you need me." Dean wasn't usually the type to give pet names and do loving things, but Cas was different he brought out a side of Dean that Dean didn't eve knew he had.

After a few minutes, Sam returns to the room with a hot cup of smelly tea.

"I hope you like this Cas it's not exactly the best tasting stuff in the world, but it will help clam your nerves."

"Thank you Sam." Sam nods in response.

"So can I ask now what's going on?" this question is met with a pointed look from Dean.

"I told you Sam, we will talk about it in the morning. We need to help him calm down."

"Dean no it's fine we can tell him, I'm okay." Cas looked at Dean with a look of understanding. Dean only nods.

"Fine. Okay well Sammy, Cas doesn't exactly remember how he got here. He doesn't know anything other than the fact he showed up here. His mojo is gonna be down for a while, we don't know why about that either, but it's okay. He is just gonna be a little more human for a while. Hence, the fact that he was sleeping, and just had his first nightmare, pretty much proved that he was basically human. Dean said worried and unsure and more in a hushed tone almost as if he had said it just a little louder Castiel might break. That's how Dean was holding Cas, as if he was something that could break at any second if he let go.

I'm just glad that Dean finally has someone else to worry about and care for than just me… Sam thinks while studying the couple.

"Okay well we will do anything that we can." Sam replies careful not to set off Dean, who is clearly agitated.

"Dean?"

"Hhmmm?" Dean looks at his angel curiously.

"Will you still want me even if I never get my 'mojo' back?" he asks making quotations with his fingers.

"Cas I will always want you. I don't care if your human or angel. To me your nothing else, but Cas. You're the man that I care about the most. I will never leave you; don't you ever think that I would leave you. For once in my life I am happy and that is because of you, Cas." Dean grabs the tea off the nightstand next to their bed. "Here just drink this and don't worry. I'm not gonna let anything happen to you." Dean wraps his arms around his angel and plants a sweet kiss to his neck.

"Dean, I'm really glad you two are finally together."

'What do you mean finally?" Dean asks his longhaired brother.

"Um Dean, for years I have always had to endure you two eye fucking each other. I was just wondering how long it was going to take you two to finally realize how you both felt about each other. But um I have to know who admitted their feelings first?"

"Um Cas did…why?" Dean asks blushing at the thought of apparently how obvious his feelings for Cas were.

"Oh um me and Bobby may have made a bet on who would admit their feelings first; I won, I bet on Cas." Sam chuckled while Dean glared at him. "What?!"

"You two made a bet on me and Cas' relationship?" Sam gulps.

"Uh yea we did, sorry I guess."

"Wait so both of you are fine that I am bi?"

"Well yea why would it bother us as long as you're happy? Plus we always knew that at some point in time you two idjits would get together." Cas just sits there listening to the conversation.

Does it bother Dean that I am a man and he is a man? Would he rather me be a woman? Is that why eh was so uncomfortable earlier? Dean looks over at his lover that is clearly lost in thought.

"Hey babe what's wrong?" Dean tightens his grip around Cas.

"Nothing Dean, I was just thinking." Dean is not convinced at his angels attempt to soothe him.

"Heya Sammy I think maybe it's time we all go to bed what do you think it's kinda late." Sam nods understanding where Dean is getting at.

"Yea I think your right Dean. Goodnight, you two."

"Goodnight Sammy." they said at the same time and smiled at each other.

Once Sam was asleep, Dean looked over at his angel that he was still currently holding in his arms.

"Hey Cas what do you say we go somewhere for a little while?" Dean pecks his cheek.

"But, Dean I thought you said that we need to all go back to sleep, because it's getting late."

"Yes I did, but that was mostly for Sammy so he would go to sleep. I think it's gonna be a little while until me and you will be falling back asleep again, especially you." Dean can still feel Cas shaking from his dream that tea didn't help much. Cas nods in agreement.

"Let's get outta here." Dean pulls Cas off his lap, still holding his hand. They don't bother with getting dressed they just grab the hotel room key and leave.

"Where are we going, Dean?"

"Well I thought we would go for a little drive until we can both calm back down."

"I am calm Dean, I am perfectly fine."

"Baby, you're not fooling me with that; you are still shaking."

"I like it when you call me that Dean."

"What? Baby?" Dean grins he never thought about Cas liking it. To Dean it was just a reminder that Cas is his. Cas smiles.

Dean starts the impala deciding to go to the nearest park. Yea, that would be relaxing. Right? Cas grabs Dean's free hand that wasn't on the wheel, threading his fingers through Deans lightly squeezing his hand. Dean smiles at the feeling.

They arrive to a little park with a swing set and a small playground for kids and a river to the far right. Dean lets go of Cas' hand already feeling cold and empty without it.

"Let's go to the water." Cas smiles.

"What's wrong Cas, and don't tell me nothing something was clearly eating at you back at the hotel."

"Nothing." Cas looks down attempting to hide his face, which only fails when Dean hooks his finger under Cas' chin forcing him to look him in the eyes showing the tears that were forming in his eyes.

"Cas what is it you won't tell me?"

"I don't want to upset you Dean."

"Baby just tell me what's wrong."

"Dean does it bother you that I am a man?

"No, no why would that bother me? Sure, I have never been with a man, but to be honest that was always because of my father, but that is another story for another day and I promise I will tell you when I'm ready.

"It's fine Dean. I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize there's nothing to be sorry about."

"I just feel like I should be sorry about something. I'm just sorry." {This is something I battle with I have really bad anxiety and it makes me feel sorry for every little thing I do.}

Dean wraps his arms around Cas looking out onto the water not knowing what to say that would make Cas feel any better. They sit there for about an hour until Dean decides he wants to tell Cas so he will understand.

"I'm sorry too Cas, I really am. I'm sorry I can't properly show you how I feel, but someday I will. It's just…" Dean trails off looking into the water mirroring the stars; placing his head on Cas' shoulder. "My Dad, I know this reason is stupid, but he abused me as a kid. Dad he would show up drunk after hunts and beat me over the stupidest things; it never mattered to him whose fault it was I would get a beating for it. One night he tried to hit Sammy with his belt but I pushed Sam out of the hotel room before it could continue and got the beating for that too… His reasoning was that Sam didn't stand up straight enough when he was speaking. When I was fifteen, I realized I was bisexual and couldn't ever admit it, but when my father noticed me looking at a guy he blew his top. He took me back to our hotel room and left Sammy at the library and he beat me unitl I passed out…that was the worst beating I had ever gotten from him. He beat me with his belt and then he decided that wasn't enough so he took his lighter and started burning little spots all over my body saying that it was my fault that my mom had died and he wanted me to get a taste of what she went through… because of me. He told me I was damned for hell because of who I was and that I like men equally to women. He told me that if I ever loved a man that he would come back from the dead and beat him dead in front of me so I could see the person I cared most about die just like he saw my mother die. When he was done saying all these awful things to like how I'm a faggot and don't deserve to be loved he… he raped me. He told me he wanted me to see how gay love was and he fucked me until I passed out from blood loss and pain. I know that wasn't love, what he did, and I know you would never do anything like that to me. I know you would never hurt me, but after that, I was never able to look at a man the same again. I was always scared that if I ever showed my feelings for you, because I was always worried you would get hurt…. I just need some time." Cas turns around and pulls Dean closer to him pulling his head into his chest and kissing his hair sweetly.

"Dean, I'm okay, he can't hurt me he's gone. I love you; don't ever think I don't love you as much as I do. I love you so much. I'm willing to do anything for you to make sure that you are happy and safe. Dean I never knew that there was any other reason for my existence until I pulled you out of hell. I looked into your eyes and knew that I would never be the same, and I didn't want to go back to the way I was. I was living an empty life, but you. You save people and never ask for anything in return. You have been hurt so many times in your lifetime and I am thankful that you have finally let me in. I love you."

"Cas…I…ugh, I'm sorry." Dean look at Cas defeated. He has never been able tot let anyone in. He never told anyone about his father beating him, because he was bi…not even Sammy knew. Dean was always so scared of how Sam would see him if he knew, but apparently he has known all along, and he didn't care. It never bothered Sam who Dean was he still loved him the same; Dean didn't even know that it was possible to be loved, unconditionally. Dean loved Cas; he just couldn't find it in him to say what was on his mind.

"It's fine Dean, I know, you don't have to say it. I love you too." Dean can't do anything at this point but cry. He pulls even tighter into Cas' chest wetting his sleep shirt with tears.

"Dean I need to tell you something; I don't think my grace is going to come back."

"What do you mean Cas?" Dean looks into Cas' fear filled eyes.

"If it were to return then I would have felt it by now already trying to build back up, but nothing I feel nothing. There are two things that you need to know incase my grace never returns. If my grace never returns then I will be human for the rest of my life; I will be able to live the rest of my life with you. Although, if my grace never returns when you get hurt I won't ever be able to heal you again, and I don't know if I could handle standing by not able to do anything to help. What if …"

"Hey Cas it's okay. I am okay nothing is going to happen to me. Your human too you can get hurt just as easily as I can. Look, okay I will make a deal with you." Dean looks into Cas' eyes making sure he has his full attention and can't help but pecking a kiss on his lips. "If your grace never comes back and we can have a normal life…then why don't we do just that?"

"What do you mean Dean?"

"Well I couldn't handle losing you and I know how you feel about me getting hurt. What if we put hunting on the back burner?"

"You want to quit hunting? Are you sure, Dean hunting has been your whole life; this is all you have ever known."

"Yes, it is all I have ever known, but Cas that's the thing neither me nor Sam wanted this life; we were forced to become hunters. We have never wanted more than to just settle down and stop and enjoy life. The hunter's life isn't a wasted life, but it's not a good one either. I care about and I know that we have just gotten together, but I have always wanted you and only you. Cas, we could settle down together. You know maybe a white picket fence and a pool and anything we want, we could have a home. Cas, Sammy has never had a home and that is one of the things I have wanted most for him was a home. I want a home, a place to go to where everything is okay, safe, and warm. Is this something you would want?"

"Dean I would love nothing more."

"Thank you Cas." Dean kisses him it starting slow, but then building up to more. It became more and more hungry with every touch. Cas' lips found their way down Dean's jaw line, sucking behind his ear tasting nothing but Dean's skin; this earned a moan from Dean. Dean pulled back only to kiss Cas again with so much more love than he has ever kissed anyone before.

"Cas I would love to continue this, but first off we are in public, at a park and I just can't... not yet."

"It's fine Dean I understand I will not push you into anything you aren't ready for."

"Cas, it's not that I'm not ready it's just… don't take this the wrong way, but I don't want to. Not yet." Cas looks hurt and pains shakes in Dean's stomach.

"It's not that, it's just that every relationship I have ever been or anything close to a relationship has been nothing but one night stands. I don't want that for us; I want this to be so much more than just sex. I want to always be with you not just for a few days or just a night."

"I understand Dean."

"Cas, please believe me when I tell you I really care about you."

"I know Dean. I love you." Cas stares into Dean's eyes; studying every single speck of color that draws him. _Beautiful_ , he thinks.

"You are mine." Cas connects their lips in a hot loving kiss moving their lips together in sync. "Mine." Cas whispers against Dean's skin making him shudder. Cas does things to him that no one ever has. Cas is his everything. He loves him he just can't bring himself to say it yet, but he will.


End file.
